Parenthood for Beginners
by lilDBZbuddy89
Summary: Originally a single chapter idea, may expand into a short series. Chichi has discovered that she and her husband are about to take the huge step into parenthood and has to break the news to Goku. Will she end up having another frustrating conversation trying to teach her husband the perils of pregnancy? Of course she will!


**AN:** This is intended to be a one-chapter story but I may change this depending on a) if I can find the motivation to continue something along this line, and b) if enough people on here want to see more.

Some Goku and Chichi for all you Go-Chi fans. Don't expect lemon because meh, I'm not in the mood to write it. I may go more into detail on that first night at some point because it sounds too funny not to write about it!

Anyway, enjoy!

\- LilDBZBuddy89

* * *

 **Parenthood for Beginners**

This was going to be a tough one to explain. Chichi stared at the test in her hand for a few more moments, wanting to make sure her eyes weren't deceiving her. After a duration in which she deemed long enough, she confirmed in her own mind that yes, the test was positive.

She was going to be a mother!

That hadn't taken them long, she thought. They'd only started love-making within the past few months – and that had proved more than difficult to explain to Goku on their first night. She recalled it well; the aftermath of their wedding in which he'd remained surprisingly jovial and polite for someone who'd claimed he didn't know what marriage had meant as a child! The food had seemed to satisfy his insatiable hunger for the time being. The two had entered the home her father had built for them, a modest little cottage set in the valley of Mount Paozu, neighbouring the forest and stream with a small plot of land for farming should they so choose to do so.

She'd taken him by the hand, trying to still her wild heart and convince it that jumping out of her mouth would do neither of them no good. They'd entered their bedroom, Chichi's face flushed with anticipation and worry. She needn't have been so nervous when Goku stared blankly when she asked if they should undress together or in private, or under the covers of their bed.

The next twenty minutes was spent explaining to Goku what couples did on their wedding night, why they did it, what happened (with a lot of flushed cheeks which baffled him even more – which only served to feed her appetite for shouting rather than her libido!), what could happen as a result of them having sex and finally, what he would have to do in order for them to succeed. They'd then spent a generous hour and a half proceeding through their first intimate moment with one another. It was off-putting to hear how surprised Goku sounded when his 'gentleman's area' (as Chichi preferred to mentally refer to it) was doing what it was meant to do when sexually aroused. This hadn't been how she'd envisioned their first night as a married couple to be but then again, why had she been surprised? He'd thought marriage was a food! He'd never been to a proper school, even if he'd still learnt the basics under Master Roshi alongside his training in martial arts.

That night had been far more uncomfortable than Chichi'd expected it to be around her 'lady's area' (as Chichi preferred to mentally refer to it). Even going to pee the next morning proved to be uncomfortable. At first she'd thought something was wrong with her but who could she turn to? It wasn't something she wished to ask her father about. So she rang a friend from the village her father still lived outside of, confident that she would be a safe person to confide in. It turned out that chafing was pretty common and was nothing to worry about, and that she should probably take it easy for the next few days… and use lube in future. Chichi had been flustered when she'd placed the phone back down, horrified that someone had mentioned something as intimate as lube. Then again for an eighteen-year-old who'd just gotten herself married, perhaps it was time for her to stop being so horrified by such things. She was an adult now, doing adult things – and adults shouldn't be so afraid of things to do with sex, she told herself.

So here she was now, a couple of months down the line, standing in the hallway outside the bathroom staring down into this tiny test. She was going to become a mother, a parent – a fully-functioning adult with huge responsibilities and soon to have another being completely dependent on her. She felt her chest swell with excitement but she wasn't so sure how Goku would take it.

In any case, he was likely still collecting firewood in the forest. She would let him know the wonderful news when he returned before passing the news to her father.

* * *

When Goku returned with his load, he dumped his collection of chopped logs outside the kitchen window. He'd managed to sneak in a workout before finishing off his task and was feeling pretty energetic, itching for more movement and more training to be done. But for now, he would have to wait. Not being in on time for dinner was deadly in this house; not being on time meant no food, no food meant a grouchy Goku which then led to an angry Chichi. He should know, it'd happened last week. Somehow he'd lost track of time and had turned up after dark – way after the time Chichi chose to go to sleep. Goku didn't mind so much on the food-front; whilst Chichi's food was scrumptious, he was more than capable of getting his own food and cooking it on a fire. Still, it'd offset him for the following day, not to mention Chichi's mad attitude had carried over. It was better for all of them for him to arrive home on time.

Entering the house, he was greeted by the wonderful warm aromas of food coming from the kitchen. "Chichi, I'm back!" He called out, having learnt it was polite to announce his presence within a building upon entering. Roshi had taught him that.

"I'm in the kitchen!" Chichi called. "Come on in, I have some wonderful news to share with you."

Wonderful news? What could she be referring to? Maybe one of his friends had come over for a surprise sparring match? Hoping this was the case, Goku poked his head through the door leading into the kitchen, disappointed to see none of his friends sitting at the table waiting for him. Instead he had Chichi with her back to him, tending to whatever it was she was cooking on the hob. "What's the good news?"

"Sit yourself down," Chichi replied glancing over her shoulder, her radiant smile making Goku all the more curious. "Do you need a drink of water?"

"No, I had a small drink from the stream before I got back," Goku politely declined her offer, smiling as Chichi wrinkled her nose.

"You could have waited, surely? Anyway," Chichi took in a small breath and walked towards him, settling herself down upon the chair next to him. Here goes. "… We're going to be parents. I took a pregnancy test this morning and it came up positive – we're going to have a baby."

Goku's eyes lit up. "Really? That's incredible!"

Inside she breathed a gigantic sigh of relief, thrilled to see how excited he seemed.

"So when do we get this baby?" Goku asked.

Of course it was going to be short-lived excitement on her part. Why had she expected anything different from him? Chichi's mood dropped from thrilled to politely patient. "… Well, we have to wait for about nine months, maybe more, maybe less."

"Why so long?" Goku asked sounding disappointed.

A nerve started to throb on her temple. So it was going to be one of these moments, was it? "Goku, how much do you know about pregnancy?"

"Well…" Goku thoughtfully rested his chin upon his knuckles. "… I know to get pregnant, you have to have sex – you taught me that! Anything else I should know about it?"

She was getting cross fast. "Are you telling me that Master Roshi didn't teach you a thing about what happens to a woman when she is pregnant?"

"Nope," Goku grinned, his happiness pissing her off even more.

"You have got to be kidding me!" Chichi howled frustrated. "How can you claim to not know this? I'm going to have to have words with that old pervert and give him a piece of my mind!" With a loud grunt she rested her aching head on her hand. "… Ok, time for another lesson in life. Goku, when a woman becomes pregnant, her body goes through some changes because she's growing a baby inside her womb. Even you aren't ignorant enough to not notice what will happen to me!"

In any case, she seemed to have caught his attention. But what came out of his mouth next baffled her. "So, does that mean Launch was pregnant? But she didn't have a baby… Her body did change when she sneezed."

Chichi stared hard at him. Launch. The blue-haired woman who'd been at the Tenkaichi Budokai, the woman with the magical sneeze that'd turned her from a blue-haired, meek and helpful woman into a blonde badass with the temper of an angry bee. "No, Goku. That's not what I meant."

"Just as well then, Launch was pretty scary when her hair went blonde," Goku laughed.

"Goku! Be serious for a minute!" Chichi snapped. "I'm trying to let you know what will happen to me while we're waiting for our baby to be born! It's going to make my tummy get bigger, my boobs become bigger and give me lots of backache! It's going to probably make me grumpier than usual, more emotional and I may even be sick during the mornings because of the hormones!" She caught the confused look in his eyes. "… The things in me that… never mind, we'll come onto hormones some other time. Just keep on paying attention because you're going to have to do a few more things around the house when we get closer to the baby being born, because I'm going to find it harder to move around."

"Gosh, that sounds awful," Goku frowned, quickly adding, "I mean you finding it harder to move! That sounds horrible."

"Well, maybe… but it'll all be worth it when the little one arrives," Chichi's expression and voice softened. Her hand reached down for the bottom of her stomach. "… It's likely that the baby could be born anytime next year in April or May, so we have a lot of work to do until then. You'll be a wonderful father, I know it." She sincerely meant it, even if all she could see in his eyes was confusion and cluelessness. Somewhere there, she was sure she could see a tiny bit of pride there.

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Goku nodded in agreement. "So, what do we need to do?"

"Well, we'll need to buy a lot of furniture and clothes and toys for the baby," Chichi began her list. "Of course we'll need to decorate the spare room, ready for when the baby is old enough to have their own room, plus we'll need to baby-proof the house so nothing can happen to them, then we'll need to organise who is going to be looking after the baby when and what job you're going to get-"

It was at this point Goku unintentionally switched off from her talk. So he was going to be a daddy? He wasn't sure how he felt about it but he could only see it as a good thing. Having a baby around the house couldn't be that bad. Plus when the baby grew older, Goku could teach them martial arts and have someone else to spar against! It would save him moping about secretly hoping Piccolo would drop in and challenge him to a rematch!


End file.
